Whenever I coach or run a workshop, some approximation of the following question comes up:
“I have a lot to do and feel overwhelmed. How can I get it all done?”
What I’ve learned over the past eight years is that what that person wants is for me to share with them a productivity system or coaching methodology, that, when used religiously, will mean they’ll be able to do it all.
But I can’t do that.
Because there isn’t one.
We’re conditioned to believe we can do it all – in many ways an inspiring and privileged belief to have. But it doesn’t yoke well with the nature of modern life, with its multitude of options, choices, distractions and possible directions. Put simply, there is just too much for us to ever be able to do it all – the game is rigged; the house will always win.
Speaking of which, you may notice this newsletter is a day late… and that’s because, despite being a naturally organised person, with an amazing :-) productivity system, various coaching methodologies and help in the form of an incredible nanny who supports our family, I still never, ever get everything done.
I like to think I can do it all, but I can’t. I started this week with big I-can-do-it-all energy and all it did was make me feel more stressed.
We put incredible pressure on ourselves to complete every item on our to-do list, to be everything to everyone, to say yes to every opportunity... But why? In what world does success look like chronic stress and overwhelm? And while productivity tools, priorities systems and coaching methodologies are genuinely transformative for reducing overwhelm, I don’t know one person who feels truly ‘on top’ of their life, do you?
Ultimately, I actually believe you can do it all. I just don’t believe you can do it all at once. Our time and energy are limited, so most of us have to make difficult choices to ensure we don’t approach burnout. We have to accept something might have to wait. We have to prioritise.
When I’m struggling between wanting to do it all and knowing I can’t, I find a little oversight helps me feel less overwhelmed. First, I take stock and work out what is taking up my time and where I need to say no. Next, as a listophile (is this a word?), I find a daily priorities list really helps… I quickly jot down everything I ‘need’ to do that day and then pick the top three non-negotiable priorities on that list. I forget about everything else while I do those (this newsletter was No.2 today!) and then look at the list again once they’re done if I have time for more. I also accept that some things on that list might not get done, and that’s also okay.
So just remember (note to self!):
Accept that you cannot do it all, and the less overwhelmed you will feel.
L. x